i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
she told me i tasted like america
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
