what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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