So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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