Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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