Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
