Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
why is half of my head shaved?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
