Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
