soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize