I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize