She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize