hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
