You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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