if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
