Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize