i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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