The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
