found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize