i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just high enough for therapy.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
