Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
