Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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