every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
