I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize