i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
