Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
