I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
