normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
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