dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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