i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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