he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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