Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
