Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize