I just made out with a guy for $7.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I think pants incapable of making pants work
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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