Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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