I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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