I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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