Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize