butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
