you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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