3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize