Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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