hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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