just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
My vagina just recognized that song.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
