nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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