The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
