I don't think brook has ever known best
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
