brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
BRING THE BAGELS
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
