Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
