CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
