we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
operation have a gay friend backfired
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Vodka?
Forever.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize