bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize