We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
